Friday, November 5, 2010

Michelle's T.G.I.Fridays: Be Careful What You Ask For

***Michelle is a girl that grew up next door to me and we attended the same church. Now she's in her early 20s and living the single life. She goes on these dates that are either lovely or horrific. She's slightly terrified at the thought of committing to someone any time soon. And of course, she has the occasional man who really catches her eye and her heart.***

In last week's post, I expressed an interest in Michelle reconnecting with a guy from her past during the past weekend. There was a black student reunion at her college.

I figured there would be an interesting story or two to come out of it. I didn't want that story to be about bad shoes guy. The story definitely wasn't. It was completely about reconnecting with a guy from her past. Who's now engaged. And has a child with the fiancee.

Like I said, this is an interesting story.

So this guy comes to town for the reunion. And he's on Michelle. He wants to spend time with her and he wants some of that time to be alone time. This of course leads to a discussion of why he's messing with fire and temptation. His response? "I'm not married yet."

That's the worst thing he could've said. He made some idiot statements about how engagement is still so far from marriage, it's barely one step above dating. Michelle (and I) happens to strongly disagree with that.

Then a discussion begins of why he's even getting married if he feels so nonchalantly towards it. His response? He basically said the fiance deserves or has earned his hand in marriage cause of the kid and all the time invested thus far.

If your reason for getting married can be turned into an insult during divorce proceedings (i.e., I only married you cause we'd been together for so long already and plus you got pregnant), you should find another reason to be married.

All of this was pretty difficult for Michelle to hear because this is a guy she was really into. And he is giving all the perfect jerky statements that could make a chick throw caution (and concern for the future of his marriage) to the wind. But she didn't give in.

It's always a problem when the person more concerned about preserving a relationship is the one who could potentially be the other woman. But this man's shortcomings aside, Michelle definitely had an interesting weekend last week.

She'll be in town tomorrow and I'm looking forward to our dinner out. We're having a girls night with Michelle, me, Gloria, Camille, and two other women from our church we hang out with a lot. I'm sure that will produce and interesting story as well.

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