Monday, May 30, 2011

Gloria's Romantic Monday: In A Perfect World

***Gloria is a friend of mine I know from church. She is a single mother. She has a boyfriend, Gregory, who we all love and her son's father, Rufus, who we all hate. She is fun-loving and hilarious. Gloria is the type of friend who'd be there for you at a party, when things get tough, or even if you need help applying for school.*** Read Romantic Monday posts.

If the world were perfect, this post would be giving info about how Gloria's birthday and birthday party went. But since my PC is temperamental, I am writing this post way in advance at work, and I don't get back until Tuesday night, so you'll have to wait until next week.

Instead, I'm just going to make stuff up. My girl Noni and I started this game in college we called "In A Perfect World." It's not a hard game to play. The only directions is that everyone who plays the game has to give a completely honest portrayal of how they envision their life in terms of what they consider perfect in that exact moment. It has to be based in reality, but it can be quite fantastic as well.

This usually involves something about our love lives, class/work, family, friend, money, physical possessions, religion, etc. No one was talking about suddenly having the ability to fly, but we were saying things like, "in a perfect world, the ex of the guy I like would suddenly pack her bags and move to Finland."

So now that you know how to play the game, I'm going to say what my "in a perfect world" would be for Gloria, if it were up to me how to make her world perfect.

In a perfect world, Gregory, Gloria's boyfriend, would somehow have Saturday night off and be free to come to her party. Or better yet, he'd show up after the rest of us arrived and surprise her. He'd kiss her, tell her he loved her so much, and then drop to one knee.

She'd be surprised not only because he was there, but because he'd dropped to one knee. She had plans of fussing because he still hadn't delivered her birthday gift and she was feeling neglected. He would tell her he knew she was expecting something great for her birthday, and he couldn't think of anything greater than making it official and telling the world that he wanted her to be his wife.

There would be chilled champagne for a toast and we would all rejoice with her that her birthday gift from the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with was a 3 carat diamond.

But his birthday gift wouldn't stop just there. Gregory would inform Gloria that a moving truck would be at her grandparents' house in the morning to move her stuff to their new place.

While they were moving, she would get a call from a lawyer, promising he had the perfect solution to her problems with Rufus, and he wouldn't be full of crap.

And when she sets up the Internet in her new apartment, there would be an e-mail waiting to be read from a great job, asking her in for an interview. That job would have steady hours with good pay, plus tuition reimbursement. Because of the steady hours, she'd be able to sign up for evening classes to finish her degree.

Her grandparents would call and say they miss having her and her son around and offer to babysit everyday for free.

Her gym would call to say she'd won a raffle for a year of free membership with unlimited access.

And I have to throw in one outlandish thing. Gloria would wake up tomorrow to discover she's actually an acoustic guitar virtuoso.

That sounds like a perfect world to me. I wonder if it's even close to what she would come up with for herself.

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Sonny's Sunday: Settling Into The Mid-20s

***Sonny is an old friend of mine. We went to elementary, middle, and high school together. He's also my friend who's doing the super-adult thing. He and his new fiancee Cher just bought a house. They're working on planning a life together, as well as a wedding next April. Even with all that stability, their love life is still interesting.*** Read Sonny's Sunday posts.

Last week, I talked about Sonny and Cher moving their wedding to April. I have a few more details about the wedding. They've set a date! April 26th. That's in the middle of the week, so I doubt they'll have many wedding day twins, except of course anniversary-celebrators. And they've settled on the Carnival Cruise Lines. That wasn't their first choice, but it is preferrable for the price. More details as they arise.

Right now, they're settling into life with both of them working full time jobs, This is the first time this has happened since they moved in together. Now that I think about it, I'm wondering how they are adjusting to all the time they are spending apart now. I will ask that the next time I speak to Sonny.

I'm also working on seeing if Sonny and Cher will go on a double date with Easy and I. I like spending time with Sonny and Cher and I'm hoping Easy will too.

Spending time with them without feeling a bit like a third wheel will be nice. Plus, they've never met Easy. In a weird way, I think spending time with us will help them feel more normal. I don't know that normal is what they want to feel, but most couples I know in their mid-20s (not that the people I know are good examples of normal) are friends with other couples and they enjoy spending time with those couples because there's no pressure to curb the couple-type behavior you engage in alone.

As far as I know, the only couples Sonny and Cher spend time with are Cher's sisters and their men. They seem to have a lot of fun together, but they aren't the same age. Her sisters are older and it's more of a family dynamic.

It's really interesting to watch these two build a life together. I'm pretty sure this is both of their first attempt at a real adult relationship, at least one that's relatively healthy and happy. So perhaps all these components I think they need will come with time and without my interference.

Well, maybe we'll invite them for just one dinner party after move in together to see how it goes.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Lion's Life Saturday: Reaching Back The Hand of Friendship

***Lion is my best friend from college. He's a very focused young man working on getting his MD. This focus makes having a love life a very difficult undertaking. But he's making it happen somehow.***

Last week, I talked about how both Lion and Rudy have big changes coming up in their life. I don't really have any specific updates about that, so I'll leave it alone for now.

But I've been talking a lot on Lion's day, and Sonny's day and Bad's day, how it is important to me to have working relationships with the women who are with my close guy friends. Those three men are some of my closest friends, and doing everything I can to ensure our friendship will be around for years to come is high priority.

This high priority feels very one-sided sometimes, so it's really nice when it feels like the thoughts and intentions and actions are reciprocated.

When Lion and I were down in Florida in April, Rudy was very nice to me. We've always been friendly (except when we first met, but that's a long story about an ex and a lap dance), but she went above and beyond last month. She was playing the perfect hostess even though I wasn't staying at her house. I really appreciated it and it made me that much more invested in her relationship with Lion.

Recently, she added another brick to the foundation of what I hope is a future genuine friendship. There have been a lot of storms around the Midwest. Not a whole lot right in the Chicago area, but the weather has been pretty crappy all around (seriously, 40-something at the end of May?).

Rudy sent me a text making sure I was doing okay and checking to make sure no one I knew was injured or harmed. It was such a sweet thing for her to do to reach out to me like that. Knowing that she's such a caring woman with a good head on her shoulders really has me wishing even harder that something shifts to allow for more of a possibility of a long-term relationship between her and Lion.

Okay, I'm done with my Rudy love fest. Hopefully next week, I'll have more to share about her move back home or his decisions on residency programs.

Friday, May 27, 2011

Michelle's T.G.I.Fridays: An Older Man Enters The Picture

***Michelle is a girl that grew up next door to me and we attended the same church. Now she's in her early 20s and living the single life. She goes on these dates that are either lovely or horrific. She's slightly terrified at the thought of committing to someone any time soon. And of course, she has the occasional man who really catches her eye and her heart.***

Quick Recap [My last post about Michelle was back in mid-April. The post was more thoughts about her breaking her cycle. After reading my post about the cycle she goes through with men, she made the decision to try and break that cycle in an effort to give a new guy with possible potential (is possible potential redundant?) a chance.] Read T.G.I.Fridays posts.

Since that time, not a whole lot has happened in Michelle's love life. I mentioned on a Wednesday that our friend Camille met a guy at a wedding last month. Well, Michelle also met a guy at this wedding.

This guy is a lot older than Michelle. She's 23, he is 35 or so. The age difference really stands out to her. I told her that difference won't seem like that much in 4 years, but that doesn't really help for today.

They spent some time together. He even visited her down in Charleston before she left for the summer. But I don't think much will come from this guy since she doesn't talk about him much.

Terrence called Michelle. At least she thinks he did. The area code is where he's stationed. But he didn't leave a voice mail. I hope he calls back. I would love for the two of them to make peace. I don't know about them rekindling a romance, but being friends isn't terrible.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Big Bad Thursday: Moving and Double Dating And Growing Up

***Big Bad Thursday is all about Bad. He's one of my best friends and was a charming, if commitment-phobic bachelor. He finally realized a woman was worth giving up complete and total bachelor-hood. So now Bad and Jordan are in love and working towards building a life together. They live in a wonderful apartment in Chicago and they are quite a fabulous couple.***

Quick Recap [The last post I wrote about Bad was back at the beginning of April. I think I've explained enough about the PC issues, so hopefully this is the last time you'll have to read it. I was talking about them looking for a new apartment and starting to muse on the next step for them in terms of living life] Read Big Bad Thursday posts.

Since that time, they still haven't moved. Bad extended his lease for one month to give them more time to apartment hunt. They did find a new apartment and they move in this weekend. I have this whole weekend off so I offered to help them move if they need it. Their new lease starts tomorrow! I can't wait to see their new place. I know it will be great. They both have such good taste.

By the end of this summer, both Bad and Jordan will be halfway done with their Master's programs I believe. It's a nice time to start to figure out what comes next. I wonder if they are planning a trip to San Diego to assess how it fits the two of them together.

Bad also had a job interview recently with a new company. The company isn't actually new, but it would be new to him. It would use the experience he's gained at his non-profit and be a big boost up the career ladder. And the best part is it's a national organization, so he wouldn't be tethered to Chicago if he gets this job. Here's hoping!

Also, on a more romantic note, my boyfriend Easy and I went on a double date with Bad and Jordan the last time Easy was in Chicago. We had so much fun. We went to the wine bar Bad, Jordan, and I all love (now Easy loves it too). It's called Vintage 338. If you live in Chicago and know your way around up north, you've got to go to this place.

After that, we went to The Wild Hare. They are closed now. When we went, it was the night before the last night. We danced and laughed and had a really good time. There was all type of hugging and kissing. The type that doesn't usually happen on a group outing, but since it was a double date, no one was ashamed of their PDA.

I tell you, I never thought I'd see the day when Bad and I were out at a club and there was all type of kissing, on the mouth!, happening out in public. But I guess that's what happens when you fall in love. Bad and Jordan were kissing and dancing and all that. Easy and I were doing the same near them on the dance floor. Seriously, had you told either Bad or myself sometime five years ago or so that we would spend our last night at Wild Hare that way, we wouldn't believe you. Never would we have believed it. But it happened. I have pictures as proof, but I didn't ask permission to post them, so sorry.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Camille's Wishful Wednesday: Guys Floating Around Like Thought Bubbles or Milky Ways

***Camille is a friend of mine I know from church. She is classified on another blog I read as a "hopeless romantic", and I think that describes her pretty well. I also think she's incredibly well-balanced and able to work on multiple parts of herself at once. She is a law student, a Sunday school teacher, and an all-around good person. She has some pretty concrete ideas about men and the type of man she'd like to end up with. But she's doing the in-my-20s-dating-follies thing as well.***

Quick Recap [My last post about Camille was back at the end of April, so it's been about a month. Stupid PC of mine. In that post, I talked about how Camille was single, but still had these men floating around her, interested in getting a piece of her heart.] Read Wishful Wednesday posts.

Since that time, Camille has followed her pattern that I've noticed she seems to have. I should do a pattern post about her like I did for Michelle. I need to do more observing though before I pinpoint an exact pattern.

What pattern am I talking about? Her tendency to be over guys before their time. Case in point: the guy from the wedding, aka Bachelor #3. Granted, there are a number of things about this guy that just aren't okay, but for Camille, their almost full deal-breakers.

The thing about this guy is that aside from his not-okay qualities, he's really sweet. And he seems really interested in Camille. But she's over him. Only she hasn't told him yet. That should make for an interesting situation since he's the best friend of one of her friends from our church. Remember, she met Bachelor #3 at that guy's wedding.

But I'm going to move on from him to talk about something more fabulous. Camille is going to Barcelona! She leaves next Friday. It's pretty exciting that she's going. And she gets class credit for it. I'm embroidering her Snuggie, so I have to get that finished by Friday. I'll make it happen, definitely. Bachelor #1 is going too, so maybe there will be some development between the two of them. People always go crazy on vacations, right?

Let's hope I have a great story to tell about Bachelor #1 or #3 next week. So it will be either sad/funny or racy/adventurous.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Tip Top Tuesday: Updates and Dates

***My girl Top is unique and one-of-a-kind. This makes the story of her love life especially interesting. Just when you think you've got her figured, she makes an unexpected move. She's my career-minded friend who's always focused on self-improvement. She's also super-independent yet a closet nurturer. Read and learn how to be fabulous.***

Quick Recap [My last post about Top was back in the beginning of April. Computer issues prevented more posts til now. The last post was about Top's plans for when she stops her current job. She has fantastic plans to really travel the world and spend some time chilling and really enjoying life. I found it really exciting when I wrote the post and I still feel that way.] Read Tip Top Tuesday posts.

Since that time, a couple of things have gone on. I'll cover them briefly, then get on the one update that is actually about Top's love life since that is the point of this blog.

She is still at her job. Part of me hoped she'd be off travelling by now, but that wasn't my realistic part. Fall would probably be better for travel anyway since she doesn't like really hot weather.

Also, she is taking care of the last details of her master's thesis. She has gone through a lot with this. When she went to NYC, she scrapped her first idea and started over. She wasn't especially motivated to pump it out and be done with it, so it's been there, in the background, inching towards completion til now.

And she had a date. The date is by far the least interesting news, but like I said this is a love life blog.

Top met a man (I don't remember where), and he found himself smitten with her and asked her for her number. She gave it to him and when he asked her out on a date, she eventually agreed. Top has never been a fan of dating. The thrill of going out with someone you don't know well just to get to know them while enjoying dinner and/or a show is lost on her.

She'd rather get to know someone organically and see what develops from a friendship/mutual attraction. This guy wore her down (imagine Steve Urkel saying, "I'm wearing you dooown baby, I'm wearing you doooown.") and she went on the date after first cancelling and him trying to reschedule for a while.

She was nonplussed about the date. He kissed her and she didn't enjoy it. He asked her back to his place and she wasn't interested. He was trying to chat her up and she was bored. He found her attractive and she wasn't reciprocating. Sometimes there's just not a spark.

Even though the date was nothing to write home about, I'm glad she went on the date. Feeling a certain way about something or someone can change if you give it a chance. She's taking chances and trying things that she might originally say no to. That's always a good thing, at least for a woman like Top, because she's so careful that even the chances she takes are calculated and thought out pragmatically.

Here's hoping the next date (with some new guy) will fare better.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Gloria's Romantic Monday: Updates On Life

***Gloria is a friend of mine I know from church. She is a single mother. She has a boyfriend, Gregory, who we all love and her son's father, Rufus, who we all hate. She is fun-loving and hilarious. Gloria is the type of friend who'd be there for you at a party, when things get tough, or even if you need help applying for school.***

Quick Recap [The last post I wrote about Gloria was back in the beginning of April. I'm going to say, again, that I was having PC issues. I spoke of her and Gregory's plans for their near and distant future. They plan to move in together in September. They also hope to move, at some point, to Texas. But Gloria's son's father, Rufus, is opposed to the move to Texas, so they were gearing up for a fight about that.] Read Romantic Monday posts.

A lot has happened since that post. All us girls went with Gloria to the courthouse in downtown Chicago for support for her. She's been back to the court a few times and a number of things have been sorted out with Rufus. He's now on record saying he's completely opposed to Gloria moving to Texas. He has also stated he wants to get their son a passport to take him on some trips around and out of the country. She's against that.

But also, they worked out a joint custody agreement and a child support agreement. So Gloria is getting (forced) help from Rufus to take care of their son and he's spending real time with his son every weekend.

Gregory is being supportive of Gloria because there's not much else he can do. He takes good care of her and has a great relationship with her son. When September rolls around, I think they'll be a nice happy family, along with Gregory's son.

In happier news, Gloria's 26th birthday is in a couple of days! She's planning on having a nice evening at home with Gregory the day of her birthday. All of us are going out next weekend. I, happily, have all of next weekend off, so I will be there to help celebrate.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Sonny's Sunday: Planning On A Life Together

***Sonny is an old friend of mine. We went to elementary, middle, and high school together. He's also my friend who's doing the super-adult thing. He and his new fiancee Cher just bought a house. They're working on planning a life together. Even with all that stability, their love life is still interesting.***

Quick Recap [The last post I wrote about Sonny was near the end of March. I think I've mentioned, ahem, several times now that my computer was having issues. So I apologize for the lack of updates. That post discussed my concern that they never spend time apart unless they are at work. That's pretty much the gist of it.] Read Sonny's Sunday posts.

All I have to say about that subject is that I've discussed it with Sonny and he has noticed it and is trying to figure out a way to address it that won't bring up every insecurity Cher could possibly have. As one of his best friends, I've encouraged him to give it time and to do my best to make her feel welcome and a real part of his whole life.

I think my boyfriend Easy will be helpful with this plan. Once he moves to Chicago, he's just so gregarious and friendly that he'll draw her in and before we know it, she'll be happy including all his people in their activities and then after that, she'll feel comfortable if they have experiences that don't always include each other. For the record, I do realize I'm being wildly optimistic.

Moving on to something more exciting: their wedding! They moved the date of the wedding up. Sonny did some research on the prices for weddings on cruise ships. Having the wedding in April versus June is like half the cost.

So now they intend to have a wedding in April on a cruise ship. I still don't know the destination of the cruise ship. But I have learned the wedding itself will take place in Miami. Apparently, the wedding ceremony has to be at a port, and they want people not coming on the cruise to be able to attend the ceremony. So really, they're bringing 50 people along on their honeymoon. Sonny says it's a 4 day reception, not a group-activity honeymoon, ha ha.

Easy and I plan on attending and I'm really looking forward to how great this wedding is going to be. So far, their planning seems pretty stress free because so many of the details are taken care of. I look forward to posting more updates as they are developed. Next week, I'll talk about what I know about their wedding party.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

Lion's Life Saturday: Changes and Decisions Coming Up Soon

***Lion is my best friend from college. He's a very focused young man working on getting his MD. This focus makes having a love life a very difficult undertaking. But he's making it happen somehow.***

Quick Recap [My last post about Lion was back at the beginning of April. I apologize for my computer issues, but yeah, it is what it is. I spoke of looking forward to the trip he and I were taking down to Florida to visit out alma mater. That weekend was amazing, and I really got to see him and Rudy together and as a couple.] Read Lion's Life Wednesday posts

So, if you notice, this post wasn't on a Wednesday. Also, the title has changed. I discontinued (for now, I think) Noni's Stargazing Saturday and I'm moving Lion to Saturday. She has a lot going on right now, and it's very difficult to keep in constant enough contact with her to be able to write frequent posts. I think the change will work for now. But for continuity's sake, I will keep the tag for Lion as "Lion's Life Wednesday".

So, Lion's life has been interesting as of late. I don't have much to say about them as a couple because I like them together and they seem happy together. Lion even stayed an extra day when we had airport/airplane issues to spend more time with her, which was great.

But they are up for some big changes in the near future. Rudy has decided she is moving back to Boston, where she is from. She is transferring graduate programs and she quit her job. This is a pretty abrupt decision, but she's happy with it. I definitely understand the abrupt decision.

This affects Lion though because he was planning on doing an away rotation down in Florida to spend a month with her. That is changing now because he doesn't want to do a rotation in Boston where she'll be staying with her parents.

He also has big changes coming up. It's almost time for him to start applying to residency programs. He has plans for going into Internal Medicine, but he doesn't know which programs he's applying to yet. He says Rudy has no effect on the application or location choice. That's crazy to me for a couple that's been involved as long as they have.

But it's not set in stone yet what will become of their immediate future. Rudy hasn't left Florida yet and Lion hasn't chosen his residency programs to apply to. I'll be following these developments to see what happens and how it affects them as a couple.

Noni's Stargazing Saturday: Goodbye for Now

***Noni is one of my really good friends from college. We were even roommates for a year and some change. But she's done with school (for now). She's starting a family with a baby boy and working on herself and her relationship at the same time. Things won't always be easy, but they're usually always interesting.***
Read Stargazing Saturday posts.

I haven't talked to Noni in a while and she has a lot going on in her life right now. So until further notice, I'm stopping my posts about her and moving Lion to Saturday. If something new happens that I just have to update, I will.


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