Michelle's T.G.I.Fridays: Double Booking Just For Fun

***Michelle is a girl that grew up next door to me and we attended the same church. Now she's in her early 20s and living the single life. She goes on these dates that are either lovely or horrific. She's slightly terrified at the thought of committing to someone any time soon. And of course, she has the occasional man who really catches her eye and her heart.***

Quick Recap [I just introduced Michelle into my blogs a couple weeks ago and wrote about her love life on this one last week. I spoke of how she is pretty much happily single, but does enjoy dating. I talked about this date she went on that was horrible, soooo horrible. And I also mentioned a guy Michael. He's this guy she met in school and the one guy who has the best chance of winning her heart, if only he'd consistently try to win her heart. He does this infuriating combo of wanting to spend time with her and then pulling back because he's spending too much time with her when really all the time spent was his idea! Very infuriating, right?] Read Michelle's posts.

 
Michelle heads back to start her school year in two days. That makes me happy when it comes to Michael because he will be in Chicago and will probably switch to I-miss-you mode and therefore appear generally more interested in her. They're supposed to be going out at some point today because this will really be her last opportunity to see him before she's gone until either her birthday (Libra!!) or maybe just Labor Day.
 
But here's the twist. There is this other guy, who I'll call Date B, who also wants to see Michelle today. He knows she's about to head back to school, so he texted her last night (while we were having a girl's night at a great bar downtown) to request to spend time with her today. Michelle didn't immediately say no. She is supposed to share today between her cousins (Thing 1 and Thing 2), Michael, and finishing packing. Yet somehow, Date B is now going to be worked into the equation? I can't wait to find out how that ends.
 
So, Date B is this guy Michelle met through her Thing 1 and Thing 2. She spends a lot of time with her twin cousins because they are the same age and they all went to college together; the twins graduated last year. Date B is a friend of a "boo" of one Thing 1 (yes, I've assigned a specific twin at Thing 1 or Thing 2 AKA Chocolate Thunda). Michelle met him and immediately liked him for one reason alone: his looks. I completely understand this. We all have that one person we can remember being sooo into, but acknowledging it wasn't based on anything but their God-given beauty. She and this guy don't have any sort of deep connection, but she likes spending time with him. I like being around pretty things too, that's why I like parks with lots of flowers and museums. Anyone can agree a date that will go no higher than a 7 or 8 on a 10-point scale, will always be made better by having your date be an exceptional piece of eye candy.
 
I'll let you know next week if she managed to squeeze all three obligations into her day, or if she ended up blowing off Michael for Date B (she did jokingly say that was an option).

Focus on Me Friday: The Baseball Game Was Such A Success

***If ever one wonders why I feel like my life could be a movie (or better yet a sitcom), it's because stuff keeps happening that seems like it could be written for storyline purposes.***

So, Sunday was such a success. I've been dying to blog about it, but I decided to wait until it was my day on this blog so I'd actually have something to blog about.

PT was late getting to the stadium on Sunday. I thought that might annoy my mother, but luckily it didn't. My father got us not only great game tickets, but passes to the Stadium Club as well. I'm not sure how that translates to other stadiums, but if you've ever had pleasure, you know how nice it is.

The best part about it was PT got to sit and dine with my parents and I and talk without the baseball game interrupting the conversation. They seemed to get along pretty well. He and my father have a very compatible sense of humor and he's very respectful. My parents were both smiling a lot. And the only one of his tattoos that showed was the Alpha Sphinx, so they couldn't be mad at that. My father is an Alpha too.

At the game, PT and my father begin tag teaming and heckling the other team, which was the Florida Marlins. I didn't know whether to fall over laughing because everything they said was so funny or feel embarrassed because everything they said was so loud. Normally it wouldn't matter, but we were soooo close. Literally, they would heckle the guy and he could hear every word. When he turned around, I was like, "oh he has beautiful gray eyes with specks of green in them." Seriously, we were close.

PT starts picking on the one guy who's kind of small compared to the rest of the Florida Marlins. This guy, Cody Ross, also happens to have a great sense of humor. And every time PT said something that made him laugh aloud, he'd go and hit a home run. This Ross guy doubled his home runs so far for the season in this game. By the third inning we were down 7 runs, so PT switched from heckling to begging them to stop doing well.

At one point, he suggested the Marlins take the Sox pitcher out to dinner as thanks for the game. He suggested Morton's. At this point, everyone around us was turning to see who had a comment every five seconds. My nervousness quickly faded when it was apparent they were all laughing. Then a foul ball was hit our way while Ross was waiting to go up to bat. PT called out to him to throw him the ball and he did! PT was sooo excited, like a little kid. Then he turns and there's this little cute blond kid with an over sized jersey on looking up at him like that cat off of Shrek 2. Clearly, he wanted PT to give him the ball. He looks down at the little kid and says, "I'm sorry."

We were all amused and/or appalled. Then PT explained that he'd been going to games since he was that kid's age and this was his first ball, and he would try and get the next one for the kid. Luckily, right then another foul ball came our way and the little kid got it. It was crazy, but also funny. I can excuse such behavior cause I know how PT is about his sports and he's the kind of guy who would pull to the side of the road to help a stranger who had just been in a car accident (I was on the phone with him when he did it before).

By the ninth inning, he had everyone loving Ross. He was talking about putting him on his fantasy baseball team, yelling "you're my boy, Blue!", and having people cheer Ross' double even though it was against the Sox. I told him he was such a turncoat and he was turning our whole section into traitors.

Then the Marlins coach took Ross out to let another guy bat. After all, it was the 9th inning and they were up 13-0. Next thing I know, I was boo-ing very loudly, along with the entire section we were sitting in! Apparently, I'm also a turncoat, lol. But we were upset they took Ross out. It was so hilarious.

PT had all of us wait at the end of the game so he could get Ross to sign his ball and take a picture with him. His smile is so big in the picture, he looks like a little kid.

I know this is Focus on Me Friday, not Focus on PT Friday. But this was such an amazing story. My parents have met many guys of mine over the years, but never had it gone so well. My mother talked the whole way home about how funny, fun, and nice PT was. At the game, my dad even high fived him at one point. I never knew it was possible for them to enjoy someone they knew I was dating that much. So, for me, it was such an amazing time and now the bar has been set really high. If things don't work out with PT, I may never introduce them to someone else until I have a ring on, lol.

Why I'm Afraid To Be Out In Public With PT's Daughter

To fully understand this, you must get two stories. 1) The first time I met PT's daughter. 2) How she might end up at the baseball game with us.

1) The first time I met PT's daughter was when I spent the night at his house but was out with friends and so I didn't get to his place until she was asleep. I planned on leaving before she woke up because we hadn't discussed me spending time with the daughter, but she woke up early. She called for PT and he went and got her and then brought her into his bedroom.

She quickly climbed into my lap, started playing with my hair, and called me Mommy. You read that right. A three year old I'd never met called me Mommy. All kinds of questions started going through my head. 1. Does she call everybody mommy? 2. What kind of three year old doesn't know her mother when she sees (or doesn't see) her? 3. Has the mother been in this bed he didn't buy until after the divorce in the house he didn't move into until after we started dating?? 4. Why has time passed and neither he nor I have actually acknowledged that she is calling me Mommy? 5. Should I tell her I'm not her mom? 6. What will her reaction be?

What did I choose to do? I just sat there watching cartoons with her and then took her to the potty and to get some chocolate milk. And then when PT distracted her, I left. It was the strangest situation ever! And after PT telling me later that no I am not his ex-wife's doppelganger, and that the daughter does indeed call women Mommy (still WTF, she's 3!), and no mommy hasn't been in his bed, I decided to just let it go. Since then, I haven't spent a ton of time around his daughter and so I'm a bit nervous that she could call me Mommy in front of my grandkids-thirsty parents and open up a can of worms I'm not yet ready to deal with.

2) I figured it would be my parents, this couple who are close family friends, and then PT and I using the six tickets for the game. My parents have assumed his daughter will be joining us and have already mentally uninvited said family friends (who've been pussy footing about confirming because the game is on a Sunday). I cannot believe that my parents want to use and expensive front row ticket and club pass on a three year old. Don't get me wrong, I would. But I've already bought his daughter DVDs, dolls, and other assorted toys. I'm invested in him and invested in his daughter. My parents don't know either of them. And they like kids a lot, but I've never seen them volunteer to bring a small person out to a ball game before.

Either way, I'm going to hold off on asking PT to bring his daughter to the game until we know for sure that our family friends aren't going to join us. I'd hate to invite her and then have to uninvite her.

PT May Finally Meet My Family

In an effort to yet further avoid explaining how the Ex is like Berger, I'm going to write about PT. If you watched SATC, you know how much Berger sucked for Carrie. And besides, talking about PT, who is still (for the most part) full of potential will make me happy as I try and avoid thinking about my post on my regular blog.

I've been encourage by some folks who read this blog to stick with making my own rules, especially when it comes to PT. On furthe review, it seems I have been doing that, but could do more. The perfect example of this is that PT hasn't met my family yet. Usually, when I begin dating a guy, the first thing I do is have him meet my family. But I've wanted to keep PT all to myself. If I'm honest, I know part of it is because he's not my parents' perfect idea of the type of guy I should be with. He's older, divorced, has a child, etc. But I think it was more about wanting to get to know him. He's the first guy I've dated in a looooong time who I hadn't known for literally years before we started dating.

So how do I choose to finally let them meet? A nice at home dinner? Nope. A dinner out? Nope. Maybe an event somewhere that still allows for that type of environment? Nope. We're going to a baseball game. My family occasionally goes to baseball games. We're sports people and we like hanging out together. PT occasionally goes to baseball games. He likes sports and he likes going places and doing things. Today my parents were bringing up how they still haven't met PT and are wondering about that at the same time they were bringing up the fact that my dad still hasn't found six people to go to this baseball game he got front row tickets and club passes for. So, when I asked if they wanted me to invite PT, they were like, "oh sure, well, you know, we don't mind. I mean if you want to it's totally fine with us. I mean, yeah, why not?" Real subtle folks.

So I picked up my phone to call him, saw that I had missed a call from him (stupid phone on silent!), called him back and of course got the voice mail. I have a very loving, committed relationship with PT's voicemail. So I sent a text with the info and he was all for it, but not sure that he's free since it is a few weeks away. When I speak to him, I need to stress how expensive the tickets are and how judgemental my parents can be which are both good reasons to not cancel on us if he accepts.

Should be interesting. But there are more reasons why it's interesting, which I will drag out into another blog post tomorrow to yet again avoid discussing the Ex!

A Funny Mix-Up

I finally came out of my phone-avoiding funk, and I was talking to my mother tonight about many things. One of them was PT. She remembered that I told her he looked like LL Cool J. I did no such thing!

He doesn't look like LL Cool J. He does have a handsome face, a great body, a lovely smile, sexy lips, and a smooth swagger I can't get enough of, but he doesn't look like him. PT looks like a light-skinned version of his father (which bodes well for the future, his dad is good-looking ).

I laughed so hard and corrected my mother. She hasn't met PT yet and it would've been horrible if she went in with the assumption that PT looked like LL Cool J. My mother is known (mostly by my close friends and me) for being no holds barred when it comes to the looks of the guys I've brought home over the years.

While I believe she would find PT attractive, I don't think she would feel he looked like LL Cool J. Let's just say Crisis Averted!

Making Plans For This Weekend

PT is such a busy man. This week is his Spring Break, and his boss had a lot of work for him to do. Consequently, I haven't spoken to him much since he told me he wouldn't be able to make time to come see me. So what is my reaction? Am I avoiding him out of an underlying anger? Nope, I seem to have something other than an expected woman's reaction to him. I'm making plans for this weekend.

The new Tyler Perry movie comes out. I'm not exactly a huge fan of his movies (I know I'm betraying my race or whatever by saying this but it's how I honestly feel so get over it), but I do like some of them. I did like the first movie (after I saw it on cable about 20 times). But what I really like is sequels. After a movie ends, I find myself wondering for literally years how the story continues for the characters. So I'm all about the sequel.

PT says he is against "gay movies." I apologize to anyone who is homosexual and doesn't like the characterization of that phrase. It basically means that sappy, make-women-cry movies and romantic comedies in general are not on his list of priorities. But the way I see it, he owes me for not bringing his butt to Rockford this week. I will definitely not phrase it that way. I'm pretty sure he's taking tomorrow off and I intend to suggest going to see that movie as a way to spend part of our day if he asks.

My mother suggested we go out to dinner so my parents can meet him. She said no pressure. My mother hardly ever means no pressure when she says it. I'm sure she means to mean it, it just never feels that way. So, at some point in the future, I have got to set up what amounts to a double date between my parents and me & PT. I don't actually mind the idea. I love hanging out with my parents. And they make such a great date. So, it'll be like any other time I do dinner and movie with them except I'll have a date too. I've never done that before. The closest I've come is hanging out with them and Bad, and once or twice with Lion. But he's just like a double of me.

Literally, Bad is me with a penis. Everyone who knows us both agrees with that characterization. So, he's around a lot cause we both like kicking it with our parents. They're such fun. So both of our parents have got some good practice at spending time with their children and someone of the opposite sex.

But it would be so different with PT because he and I are dating. And there's the age difference. I literally cannot think of anyone in his age range (he's 33) that my parents spend time with. I can think of some people who turned 30 last year or this year, so I guess that's kind of close... Did I mention I tend to overthink things? Thank God for my friends and this blog so I don't have to share my neuroses with PT, lol.

My Brother is Engaged!!

My brother, we'll call him Louie, got engaged last night!!! Yay!!! I'm so excited for him and his new fiance, who we'll call Keisha. They've been together for a couple of years. I've been waiting for like 8 months to hear this news. I'm so glad for them.

The first thing I did was have a chat with my mom where she told me all the details of how Louie and Keisha came to the house and told her and my dad all the details of the proposal. Did I mention today is my brother's birthday? I figured he would pick a holiday time to propose, and I'm pleasantly surprised that he chose his own birthday, lol.

The second thing I wanted to do was call PT and tell him the news. He has gained a place on the list of people I contact when I have news, mundane and important. The othe people on the list are Bad and Top and two other friends I haven't mentioned yet, who I'll call Lion and Noni. But I can't for the life of me figure why PT is on that list. He's never available when I call him. I can't remember the last time we spoke because I called and he answered. Usually it's because he's calling me or we're texting or e-mailing. I'm not one to judge our forms of communication, but it is slightly frustrating to have all these things about my life to tell him and not be able to.

I think an important part of a relationship is the part where you validate each other's lives and the things that happen in them. We do this to an extent. Most days, we discuss how our days were and things that happened during our days. I love hearing all the little details of how his day went and the difference he's making in the lives of his students. And I love being able to be there for him when his days aren't perfect. I just wish he could be there for me.

But enough about me. Congratulations Louie and Keisha!!!

Advice From My Grandmother: Get PT To My House

Well, first thing I want to mention is that the link isn't at all what I have in mind when I have PT over to my house. But, I found it an intersting result when I Googled "romantic evening at home". But seriously? A lavendar heart-shaped wreath? LOL!

Moving on. PT is a man I've been seeing since we met on Halloween last year. We both have incredibly busy schedules. I'll explain in more detail at some point. But, I've asked him a couple of times to come visit me where I live, and he always has a (good) reason why he can't make that happen. I've been trying to be patient and not insecure or jump to conclusions, but it is getting more frustrating each time something comes up that is more pressing that working on our relationship.

Relationship is a word that may be a little strong for what we are. I like him a lot, but in the five months we've known each other, we haven't gotten very far. We've never spent more than four hours (awake) together. There is still so much I don't know about him. There is still so much he doesn't know about me. But, for reasons unknown to me, he is the man I'm emotionally investing in exclusively for now. We haven't discussed exclusivity, and I hope we don't any time soon, but I can't help my heart feeling what it feels. Believe my, I've tested my ability to want more than just him. It didn't go so well.

But, on to the part that includes my grandmother. She is a huge fan of PT. I mean, it's to the point of over-reaching. She's never met him, she's never even seen him. She only knows about him what I've told her. Don't get me wrong, I've told her a lot, that woman can ask questions for 2 hours straight and still come up with more. But she's is in PT's corner. And she thinks a key to taking our relationship to the next level involves him coming to visit me. Did I mention we live in different cities? Even a day trip would make a difference, so she's right in that aspect.

But I can't shake the feeling that my grandmother in inferring more than just show him I know how to keep house. I won't dwell on that point, but I find it amusing that my grandmother is helping me plot to win this man's heart. One of my best friends, we'll call her Top, would always advise against plotting. She's all about organic development of relationships. That works for her. This works for me. I'm not planning out every detail of every encounter, but I have in my mind the basic structure of what I would like to happen. It's super flexible, of course, but it makes me feel more in control of the situation and less emotional. I don't like being emotional even a little bit if I can help it, but that's a story for another time.

There is one problem with this plan I have in my head of how I'll make my time when PT comes to visit me go spectactularly: PT keeps being not able to come! He agreed that he would look at his schedule and see about coming up here this week while his students are on Spring Break. But then he called me today to say that his boss had some problem with some project that wasn't finished to his liking, and now he's taking the time to get it done.

We just had a talk, not even three days ago about how he regrets that his personal life always seems to come last to everything else. I told him that was definitely the way it was and it sucked, but I understood the demands on his time. It's true. The things he does are so meaningful to so many people, and I would never dream of asking him to do something different. But I can't help but feel neglected and fear that he will never ever find that balance. But here's hoping he gets his work done and gets his butt up here. I really don't wanna have that conversation with my grandmother and tell her he changed his plans yet again.