Big Bad Thursday: Busy Days, Happy Days, and Birthdays

***Big Bad Thursday is all about Bad. He's one of my best friends and was a charming, if commitment-phobic bachelor. He finally realized a woman was worth giving up complete and total bachelor-hood. So now Bad and Jordan are in love and working towards building a life together. They live in a wonderful apartment in Chicago and they are quite a fabulous couple.***

Things with Bad and Jordan are going well as usual, with no new developments to report. They are just going through their days as working grad students, shacking up in happiness and bliss.

But I am really starting to miss Bad. I have not seen him in what feels like a very long time. And we don't talk as much as we used to. All of this is to be expected. But it still kind of sucks. But the good news is Bad is not the type of guy to let a relationship consume all of who he is. He has a pretty demanding job as well as having just started grad school. All of this keeps him pretty busy.

But our birthdays are coming up! We've celebrated our birthdays together every other year since we started hanging out as adults. I don't think it was on purpose, it just kind of worked out that way. This year our birthday plans have been shaping up kind of well I think. We, along with Michelle, another good friend of mine, are celebrating our birthdays together this year.

The plan we've settled on is having a party at a club all three of us love. We have sort of flaky friends. What can I say, they've got a lot going on and can't always keep commitments. But we need four people for sure who can commit to this party. Who might that fourth person be? Jordan! This sounds kind of sappy, but it just seems like they're even more meant to be when she fits into the puzzle so perfectly. We don't have to cajole one of our friends into making a commitment so far ahead of time, Jordan will be there for Bad.

So our party will be a success, even if it's just the four of us. I've hung out with just Bad and Jordan, and also with just Bad and Michelle. It was so much fun, and I know that with all four of us there, it will be even more fun. I'd love for all our friends to join us, but it's not imperative.

Bad is saying goodbye to his first 25 years just like I am in just under two weeks. He'll be doing it with a woman by his side that he loves with all his heart and looking towards a future he's already creating for himself. I'd say life is pretty good for him right now.

Camille's Wishful Wednesday: Work Is Better Than Play This Week

***Camille is a friend of mine I know from church. She is classified on another blog I read as a "hopeless romantic", and I think that describes her pretty well. I also think she's incredibly well-balanced and able to work on multiple parts of herself at once. She is a law student, a Sunday school teacher, and an all-around good person. She has some pretty concrete ideas about men and the type of man she'd like to end up with. But she's doing the in-my-20s-dating-follies thing as well.***

No quick recap since I just wrote about her last week, but I do want to take a minute to diverge from talking about Camille's love life to talk about her career planning. In the intro, I mention she's a law student. But I don't know if I've ever mentioned that she just started law school last month. So it's quite an adjustment for her, in a number of ways.

One thing she's had to get used to is the different needs for studying. She's got a study group and a study partner. She's just now coming around to seeing the merit of the study group. She's still not into the idea of having study partner. The way she's described this guy, I wouldn't want to study with him either. He sounds horrible. He's Mexican and Camille is African-American. For some reason, he thinks that means they have to always discuss race. That is a constant annoyance to her.

That plus all his habits that drive her crazy. He has allergies and won't take a Claritin, he always taps his pen, he smacks his gum, and he cracks his knuckles. For someone who likes to study in silence, it's a real hassle. Add that to the fact that she never calls him to study, he always finds out where she is and then shows up. He's now Mexican Stalker Guy. I know that's incredibly politically incorrect, but I don't care. When the only topic of convo you bring up is Jesse Jackson, Jr., Kanye West, Nas and Kelis, and the black people on the wire, you deserve it.

Now, back to her love life. Malik is pissing me off. I was singing his praises about making time to see Camille no matter what. That was rather short-lived. He cancelled on her for a date last week. And she's starting to notice a disturbing trend. They only spend time together at his house. That could be because of cheap-ness or broke-ness. I'm not sure. Last week, Malik's excuse for not seeing her is that he was "messed up." Whatever that means. Camille didn't know if he meant financially or emotionally. WTF is all I have to say.

And Malik doesn't make good decisions. He is subleasing his apartment. He made this decision before he had another place to live. Who does that? I want to give him the benefit of the doubt, but he is starting to annoy my girl Camille off and that doesn't work for me. They're supposed to go out one day between now and the end of the week. Hopefully he'll regain her good graces. They're still too new for him to be acting like this.

Tip Top Tuesday: Building A Man

***My girl Top is unique and one-of-a-kind. This makes the story of her love life especially interesting. Just when you think you've got her figured, she makes an unexpected move. She's my career-minded friend who's always focused on self-improvement. She's also super-independent yet a closet nurturer. Read and learn how to be fabulous.***

Last week, I was talking about Top making up for lost time by focusing on all the men trying to pay her attention now. She's still doing that and I'm happy for her because it's something that we single women do. We notice men noticing us, take the compliment and confidence boost, and move on with our day until someone notices us who's worth noticing back.

Top and I were talking about this article she was reading online in Marie Claire. It categorizes single women. We agreed about what category I was, but not which one she was. By the way, I'm going to write a post on my main blog about my categorization. I thought she was a phoenix because I think she's still bouncing back from her break-up with her ex last year. She feels like she's bounced back and is more of the free-spirited or the trailblazer. I think those two could also work as descriptions for her.

This led to a discussion of what kinds of men we'd pick for each other. She asked me to build her a man, lol. I honestly had never thought about it for her before, but I did when she asked and she actually liked the guy I built for her. So I'm going to share him here. I've never met a guy like this though.

*Tall, dark-skinned, great smile

*Great relationship with his mother and with God

*He'd be an animal person, and interested in something green, like the environment or something like that.

*He's be into his career, but he wouldn't have the type of job that makes you work 70 hours a week

*He's be athletic, and a reader

*He'd be traditional, but open-minded
 
*I think I'd want him to be a guys guy, you know? Like loving cars, tools, and working with his hands and stuff, lol
 
*Definitely a thinker, but not so full of his own-self worth and some 'thinkers' tend to be

*And he'd be fearless.

I think I described a pretty great guy and I was glad to hear she'd date him, if only we could find him, lol.

Melody's Monday: Second Year of School, And She's Doing Fine

***Melody is my little sister for all intents and purposes. She has just begun her second year of college. She's learning the ups and downs of relationships, as well as what she's looking for in a relationship as a young adult. Her ideas of romance are informed by the Bible, parents, romantic comedies, and friends. Take that, add in some newfound freedom, and you've got a recipe for interesting tales.***

Last week, I was talking about how Melody was newly single and that she was hurt and moving on. And she is; moving on, I mean. The last time I spoke to her, she was talking about trying to change the type of guy she attracts. I was so glad to hear that from her because it meant she wasn't about to slip into self-pity, miss-my-man, woe-is-me mode.

Melody is sometimes reserved and so she attracts the kind of guys who like that. She's also expressed an interest in dating men outside her race. I don't know how I like that as an actual goal, but I think the change could be good. Anyone who's honest with themselves will admit that overall, there are some cultural differences that make dating white men or Latino men very different from dating black men. This is just a generalization, and she could very well find herself a Latino guy who is culturally exactly like every guy she's already dated.

I would prefer if she just wanted to expand her horizons and be open to dating whatever kind of guy as opposed to just black men. But I'm less concerned because she's not an aggressive woman. So I know she won't wake up to the nearest cute white guy and ask him out. Therefore, she won't have to explain in a few weeks that she like him cause he's not black. That would be bad. But I don't think that's gonna happen.

What I do know is it would make for an interesting set of stories if she gets involved in an inter-racial relationship. It would be very new territory for her.

Sonny's Sunday: Settling Into Home Life

***Sonny is an old friend of mine. We went to elementary, middle, and high school together. He's also my friend who's doing the super-adult thing. He and his new fiancee Cher just bought a house. They're working on planning a life together. Even with all that stability, their love life is still interesting.***

Quick Recap [It's been five weeks since I've written about Sonny. The last post was talking about trouble in paradise. They were fighting a lot and most of the fights were about her not feeling secure in their relationship. I expressed concern over the fighting and also hope that it would soon resolve itself] Read Sonny's Sunday posts.

In the time that has passed since the last post, I haven't heard a lot from Sonny about his arguments with Cher. I was hoping that was attributed to either a lack of fighting or a desire to work it out just between the two of them. I think it may be more of the second one. It would have worked better for me to a be a person to talk to about their fights if I were just his friend or definitely both their friends. But I'm in a weird position of being definitely his friend and sort of her friend. I've reached out to her a couple of times to try and see if we could be friends outside of him, but it hasn't netted much yet.

You can imagine how glad I was when Sonny invited me to his house for a game night this weekend. I was going to get to see the two of them together in their home environment for the first time since the last game night of theirs I went to, which was only two weeks or so after they bought the house. He hadn't even proposed yet back then.

I arrived at their house and was super glad to see they didn't have a lot of tension. The day they helped me move from Rockford, there was obvious tension. Today, there was just the usual tension I see between them because they seem to automatically choose opposite ways of accomplishing any and every task. Literally, everything. There was a disagreement about how to order a pan of fried chicken, about whether or not to turn off the music when we played games, about how to pick the teams for games, about where people sat, about getting the coasters from the kitchen. Like I said, everything.

I don't want to make it seem like they were arguing a lot because they weren't. It was mostly him suggesting something, her shooting it down, him protesting, and then them doing what she suggested. I felt like I was the only one who noticed it though. Of course, everyone else at the game night was her sisters and their men, so maybe they're so used to it, they don't notice. There was one other person at the game night, I invited a guy to come. It's a bit weird to bring a date to a friend's game night, but what can I say, I wanted to spend time with this guy and I figured it wouldn't hurt to show the new fiance of one of my best friends that I have guys that are not her man that I'm interested in. Never dated Sonny, never wanted to date Sonny. But I can't assume she knows that to be true. Every little bit helps me keep my affianced (to a controlling person) friend in my life.

But he seemed happier. He didn't shoot me any looks that suggested he needed a hug or a talk or anything like that. And they seem to work. When they weren't disagreeing about stuff, they were smiling and enjoying each other's company. I don't know that they've ever been the type of couple to call each other baby and engage in PDA, so I can't expect that. But I feel a bit better that they've settled into a routine or a home life that works for them. In fact, Cher made part of dinner from the garden they planted. We have fried green tomatoes and collard greens. If planting and harvesting a garden doesn't speak of domestic life, I don't know what does.

So if Sonny doesn't bring up Cher's controlling nature, I certainly won't say anything about it. It's not like she's trying to control just him, she seems to try to control everything. And I don't think it's a personality trait he's unaware of. I'm even willing to bet the controlling nature is more bearable than the insecurity because he's such an easy-going and accomodating guy. I don't think he'll mind doing things her way if it gives her an added sense of security and helps them avoid arguments.

Noni's Stargazing Saturday: A Plan For Independence, But It Depends...

***Noni is one of my really good friends from college. We were even roommates for a year and some change. But she's done with school (for now). She's starting a family with a baby boy and working on herself and her relationships at the same time. Things won't always be easy, but they're usually always interesting.***

Quick Recap [My last post about Noni discussed some difficulties between her and Eric. They had run into some financial issues and decided it was best for her to go live with her brother for a couple of weeks until they got things sorted out. At this point, they are supposed to be back living together. They also were having some issues in terms of Eric showing his commitment more to his new family. But they had a good discussion about it before Noni left town and things were looking up.Read Stargazing Saturday posts.

Well, it's been three weeks and Noni is still hours away from her fiance living with her brother. The money that Eric was supposed to be saving didn't get saved because of other obligations. Noni feels like he gives those obligations more importance that she and her son. I feel so bad for her to be going through this distress.

What's worse is that they are fighting again. They fight about him not calling when he says he will. They fight about him going out all the time while she's always at home with their baby. They fight about him letting his mother stop him from saving money for his baby. They fight about when they will actually get married. It's pretty bad.

It reminds Noni of a pretty toxic relationship she had in college. This guy, a Pisces, was quite horrible. But things with Eric aren't quite that bad. They are just bad enough for her to plan her escape route. Yep, her escape route. She doesn't like having to be dependent on Eric as she is now. So she has come up with a plan to fix that situation. I'd be happier if her plan included becoming independent whether she was with him or not. But it seems like her plan for independence doesn't include Eric.

It's a good plan though. It involves her working, utilizing her family that can actually help with her son, and finishing school by the end of next year. I'm just concerned that if Eric gets wind of her plan, he'll suddenly behave better so she doesn't leave and that will de-rail her plans. Plans that could still be fulfilled whether or not she's with him. But only time will tell.

Michelle's T.G.I.Fridays: Looking For A "School Boo"

***Michelle is a girl that grew up next door to me and we attended the same church. Now she's in her early 20s and living the single life. She goes on these dates that are either lovely or horrific. She's slightly terrified at the thought of committing to someone any time soon. And of course, she has the occasional man who really catches her eye and her heart.***

Quick Recap [The last time I wrote about Michelle, I was talking about the time period right before she went back to school. It's been five weeks since then. Wow, that's a long time. But Date B wanted her time and so did Michael. She had to split up her time before heading back to school carefully. So, how did it turn out?] Read the TGIFridays posts.

Well, she chose Michael. I'm not surprised by that. One could guess that from the fact that he has a name and not a date letter! But that was then and now I must tell a quick recap of the last five weeks.

Michelle has been back to visit the city twice since she went away to school. Stupid Michael! I say that because she's only seen him once. I don't know if him going to visit her isn't a option (I haven't asked), but when she's in town, why can't he make time to see her, especially when she gives days of notice before she gets here. He's definitely exhibiting behavior which is familiar to me. It's called he's-just-not-that-into-you behavior.

The person in me that always wants to give the benefit of the doubt doesn't want to completely down him. Maybe he is into her and he just doesn't know how to show it...? Maybe he's super sensitive and isn't really able to deal with the fact that she seems to be moving on into her life with or without him...? I don't know what it is. But I don't like hearing from her that he stood her up. Even if it does mean we get to get our Sex and the City on by having martinis at our favorite bar.

On to the point of the title of this post. Michelle is bored when it comes to guys. There isn't anyone at her school she wants to date. In fact, I don't think she's been on a date in the last five weeks. That Date B guy is out of the picture, he was a mess anyway. But at her school, there should at least be someone to flirt with and hang out with. But alas, tis not to be this semester. No new transfers, no one has gotten hot over the summer.

There was this one guy who flirted with her at the beginning. He was a guy in her major who she was having her first class with. She noticed him noticing her and noticed him too. Then she found out that he had a girlfriend. Who he had been with for a while. Who was pregnant. Which begged the question, "why are you flirting with me?!"

There was this other guy too, who happened to be the fraternity brother of the first guy. He likes Michelle; she sees him as just a friend. She's been enjoying the attention, but not wanting to encourage it by spending too much time with him.

So basically, she's having a lot of false starts. The semester is 1/3 over at this point and still no school boo. Her Chicago boo is sometimes full of crap, so Michelle's love life doesn't seem to awesome right now. But I imagine it will improve sooner rather than later. And even if it doesn't improve to the point of her having a guy, there will always be silly/crazy/funny stories to share.

Big Bad Thursday: You... Complete... Me

***Big Bad Thursday is all about Bad. He's one of my best friends and was a charming, if commitment-phobic bachelor. He finally realized a woman was worth giving up complete and total bachelor-hood. So now Bad and Jordan are in love and working towards building a life together. They live in a wonderful apartment in Chicago and they are quite a fabulous couple.*** Read Big Bad Thursday posts.

I doubt Jordan or Bad are cheesy enough to say anything like that to each other (at least in public), but that seems to describe them right now. Bad's like was pretty cool if I do say so myself, but since Jordan has moved here, it just seems more... complete now.

Before, he had a pretty good job he enjoyed but it was starting to have as many negatives as positives. Now, he's talking about making a move within his company to a job that is more suited to his needs and talents.

Before, he was talking about grad school as a viable option and something to do. Now, he's a grad student with plans of travelling abroad within his program.

Before, he was saving up money for a nice apartment but really spending more helping his family. Now, he has a better balance and isn't letting doing for them affect his ability to do for himself.

Before, it bothered him that some of his acquaintances were a bit flaky and couldn't be counted on. Now, it's not much of a concern because he has a built-in person to hang out with.

Before, he would spend lots of money travelling to and from St. Louis. Now, his money goes into making his and Jordan's apartment a home for them.

I'm not saying all these things immediately improved the day she moved to Chicago, but there's definitely a correlation there. From the moment he began to seriously discuss the possibility of her moving to his city into his apartment, it seemed like he got his stuff even more together. That's what a good woman does: she's a good influence without being a nag. I think because she loves him just for who he is, it makes him want to be the best version of himself. Bad and Jordan are definitely on their way to being one of those power couples I always admire.

Camille's Wishful Wednesday: Horror Stories Made To Ruin Your Happiness

***Camille is a friend of mine I know from church. She is classified on another blog I read as a "hopeless romantic", and I think that describes her pretty well. I also think she's incredibly well-balanced and able to work on multiple parts of herself at once. She is a law student, a Sunday school teacher, and an all-around good person. She has some pretty concrete ideas about men and the type of man she'd like to end up with. But she's doing the in-my-20s-dating-follies thing as well.***

Quick Recap [I'm going to do a quick recap even though it's only been two weeks since I wrote a post about Camille, but what can I say? I like doing quick recaps...? When we last heard about Camille, she was getting into a dating groove with Malik. Malik is a pretty cool dude who's biggest problem is that he's a different religion from Camille. That hasn't stopped them from dating though, and it certainly hasn't stopped Camille from being in serious like with him.] Read the Wishful Wednesday posts.

The type of people that Malik and Camille both are is the type to think way past the current situation (reminds me of me...) and to let things far in the future affect their present. Even if those things are only slightly possible to actually happen. Camille has been saved from doing this to her normal extent because Mailk basically does it for her. So while they've been dating for a month and some change now, they talk about things like how they would raise their kids.

I don't see a huge problem with that if that matches who you are and how you plan your life, so for them I guess it works, since they both have these discussions. The problem comes in when such discussions only highlight their differences. He would want the kids raised in his religion, Camille would want them raised in her religion. Neither of them intends to ever compromise. This leads to a discussion of couples that are able to co-exist happily in their different religions. And I'm not talking "just happen to belong to a religion", I'm talking "believe strongly in all their religious tenets and would never convert to anything else, possibly ever".

It's becoming rougher on Camille as she realizes how much she's into Malik. He's been telling her about the couples he knows that are not of the same religion and how it's possible. She can focus on the negative and so she had these horror stories to share to counterbalance his optimism.

Story #1: There are support groups out there for people of her religion dating people of his religion. She sees this as something that must be horrible and hard to endure if they have and actual support group for it. This apprehension about how so many other people handle the same situation makes it difficult for her to handle things like him asking her to visit him while he's out of town (in three months) and referring to her and the term girlfriend all in one sentence. I'm sure that under different circumstances, those things would be music to her ears, but instead Camille is trying to guess the number of days before she needs a support group. I feel pretty badly for her that this is so stressful.

Story #2: A cousin of a friend of hers decided she was marrying someone of a different religion. The guy's family threw a bridal shower for her. Turns out, that shower was a conversion ceremony. Her family was understandably upset when they found out. I don't even think Malik's religion has such a ceremony. And because his family is a number of religions, I doubt they'd even consider such a thing. And then there's always the thought that even of someone "converts" you, you can always convert back, and/or sue. But this story is a horror story nonetheless.

It's hard for Camille to think about just enjoying the moment when she naturally looks to the future. It's harder when she's dating a guy who does it even more than her. At least it's not affecting her ability to be able to concentrate on her law school work. But it certainly is interesting to watch...

For next week, I intend to investigate whether or not he considers her his girlfriend.

Tip Top Tuesday: Making Up For Lost Time

***My girl Top is unique and one-of-a-kind. This makes the story of her love life especially interesting. Just when you think you've got her figured, she makes an unexpected move. She's my career-minded friend who's always focused on self-improvement. She's also super-independent yet a closet nurturer. Read and learn how to be fabulous.***

Last week, I was talking about these guys who weren't important enough to get blog names. They still aren't, but the one who I spoke of as not being free to even like Top has made a fool of himself. It was something that would be sweet, were it wanted. But instead it was just over the top. He wrote her a poem. A sweet, totally not wanted poem. So she has put some space between her and this guy, and they aren't going to be friends anymore, I don't think.

But as to the title of this post, Top has been noticing something about all the men who are giving her attention. She has noticed that there are a lot of them clamoring for her. It's not that she hasn't always attracted the eyes of men, it's just that this if the first time in years she's even bothering to take notice of it.

Top was in three relationships from age 14-24. There wasn't a big gap in between each one, and she's a very faithful girlfriend. So when she emerged as this single woman, it was time to start paying attention. If you add in the fact that she's nowhere near being in a relationship with anyone anytime soon, that leaves her open to noticing all the people noticing her.

All the relationship boundaries are gone and it's just Top standing there looking fabulous, ready to receive compliments from all the lovely men who think she's amazing!

Melody's Monday: The Fall Brings A Fall

***Melody is my little sister for all intents and purposes. She has just begun her second year of college. She's learning the ups and downs of relationships, as well as what she's looking for in a relationship as a young adult. Her ideas of romance are informed by the Bible, parents, romantic comedies, and friends. Take that, add in some newfound freedom, and you've got a recipe for interesting tales.***

Quick Recap[The last time I wrote about Melody, she and Tweety were getting ready for the next school year to start. He had decided he wasn't transferring schools and things were all good. Melody seemed really happy and I was happy for her.] Read Melody's Monday posts.

Since that time, they've broken up! And it was about such bullshit. Tweety isn't a virgin, Melody is. Anyone who's ever dated a young college man who is used to having sex may share her pain. It was a slightly difficult decision for Melody about how to handle it. She ultimately decided to focus on her goals she had in place before she had the boyfriend. She intends to stay a virgin until she's married.

I talked with her about it before they broke up and she was asking if she was right to make this decision. That let me know it was based so much on the things her parents told her should be. I told her to pray about it and think about it and she did decide it was something that mattered to her and not just because her parents said so or her church says so. And when she told Tweety this, he said he could handle it, but it was basically a countdown to him deciding he couldn't handle it.

He broke up with her and ended up leaving town to go to a school in Tennessee somewhere. I say good riddance. It would be more difficult for her to be at school if he was there because they had started to blend friends. And now they'll just be her friends.

Melody is feeling hurt by the breakup, as well she should. He knew this about her when they met (through church friends, no less), and he said it was okay. He was full of crap and I'm so happy that she got out when she did, even if it wasn't her decision. She would have regretted it if she had sex with him just to not lose him. No guy, especially a 19 year old guy, is worth that depth of compromise.

Big Bad Thursday: Honeymoon Phase In Full Swing

***Big Bad Thursday is all about Bad. He's one of my best friends and was a charming, if commitment-phobic bachelor. Then, he finally realized a woman was worth giving up complete and total bachelor-hood. So now Bad and Jordan are in love and working towards building a life together. They live in a wonderful apartment in Chicago and they are quite a fabulous couple.***

Quick Recap [In my last post, I was explaining how the first few days were going for Bad and Jordan. This is all from his point of view of course. He described everything in such a lovely way, that I can't imagine she feels anything different.] Read my Big Bad Thursday posts.

Since that last post, which was almost a month ago, things are still awesome between them. They are pretty much still in the swing of their nesting/honeymoon phase, or whatever you want to call it. When I spoke to Bad most recently about how things were going, he was very effusive in his praise.

He spoke about how since Jordan had moved to Chicago, things just felt better. Aside from now having access to each other that just wasn't possible while in different cities, they were able to just enjoy each other's presence.

Bad spoke of Saturdays just relaxing and enjoying the city. When he felt like going for a drink in the middle of the week, he didn't have to call 10 different friends to see who was available. He felt like he has a built-in best friend who always down to hang out and do stuff. And what makes it better is that he loves talking to her about any and everything that comes to either of their minds. And of course, the proximity helps with the bedroom activities too.

I'm just so happy for Bad, he seems like he couldn't be happier right now. Even with all they have going on, both working and both in grad school, they still are managing to find time to work on themselves and their relationship. Right now, her moving to Chicago is looking like the best decision ever.

Tip Top Tuesday: Man Eater? Depends on Who You Ask

***My girl Top is unique and one-of-a-kind. This makes the story of her love life especially interesting. Just when you think you've got her figured, she makes an unexpected move. She's my career-minded friend who is a closet nurturer. Read and learn how to be fabulous.***

Quick Recap[The last time I wrote about Top, she had decided to focus on herself again. Things with CG hadn't ended well. She was focusing on her career and her life in NYC. She was turning down any guy who seemed like he might be like the rest. By that, I mean that any guy who was placing these expectations on Top they had in mind before they even met her. You'd think the guy would at least edit their expectations to fit her, nah they just had a cookie cutter vision which only led to disappointment because Top is anything but cookie cutter.]

Read the Tip Top Tuesday posts.

So, in the month since I've written about Top, not much has developed in her love life in terms of a guy worth mentioning. But she has been making friends with a man at work who seems to be romantically interested in her. I don't know that anything will come of it, but I'm glad to hear that she's encouraging a friendship with someone she knows likes her.

There is another guy who isn't available to Top to like, but that hasn't stopped him from becoming emotionally involved with her. Unfortunately, he's all alone in this emotional situation. It's actually kind of funny. I can't imagine how these guys are getting themselves into these situations. At least he hasn't declared his love for Top yet. May I mention again that he's not available to even officially want her. But then again, there's always next week for him to further make a fool of himself.

Camille's Wishful Wednesday: The First Date And The Gala Date

***Camille is a friend of mine I know from church. She is classified on another blog I read as a "hopeless romantic", and I think that describes her pretty well. I also think she's incredibly well-balanced. She's able to work on multiple parts of herself at once. She is a law student, an actively dating single woman, a Sunday school teacher, and an all-around good person. She has some pretty concrete ideas about men and the type of man she'd like to end up with. But she's doing the in-my-20s-dating-follies thing as well. I find her love life pretty entertaining, so she was the perfect person to add to the medley. Enjoy.***

Quick Recap [Last time I posted about Camille I mentioned two guys you need to know about for Camille: King and Malik. King has I'm-just-not-that-into-you-itis, so you'll have to read the last post to get any info on him. Malik however, has provided lots of new action. I am supposed to be writing about her first date with Malik and her gala date with Malik. I'll get to that now]
Read Camille's posts.

Camille's first date with Malik was interesting because of all the activity before the date actually happened. She drove to his place and he drove from there. While they were there, he gives her a tour and she discovers she's not a fan of the way the apartment is set up, all the way down to the too-large television in the bedroom. She informs him of this fact, which I found hilarious.

They leave to go to the restaurant (one of my favorites in the world), but they make a stop first at his... family reunion! Yes, indeed. They stopped on their way to their first date to a family reunion. And the cherry on top is that when Malik introduced Camille to his dad and aunts (or something like that), he said, "oh is this the fiance?" Their first date! Did Camille go running as fast as her feet could carry her? Nah, she just accepted that perhaps his family was a little zany.

But there's more. At the family reunion, half the family is Camille's religion, half is Malik's religion. Those two halves were having a religious debate. At the family reunion. Holy books came out. I'm not kidding. Let's just move on to dinner. Compared to the first half of the story, dinner was non-eventful except to let Camille know she was a fan of Malik and was looking forward to the gala event the next weekend.

Michelle and I went shopping with her a couple of times throughout that next week so she could find the perfect dress. Easier said than done since the style of fancy dressed look suspiciously like the party dresses I wore as a six year old. Camille wanted a floor length gown (even though she has the most amazing legs) so floor length gown we found, finally, at the 28th store. There is nothing wrong with exaggerating.

On to the gala. Malik was late, very late. He was so late! Now that I'm done beating that dead horse, Michelle and I were at Camille's house to see her off, and we were there an extra hour! Okay, now I'm done. But after we met Malik, we were pleased. Michelle and I agreed that while he was shorter than he claimed, he was attractive, had style, looked good in a suit, and was probably the exact kind of guy we like to hang out with. We imagined he would be tons of fun if he was around long enough to actually spend time with our whole group of friends.

Malik wasn't on his best behavior for the night. He was a bit neglectful at the gala. He was hanging out with his friends and taking lots of pictures, leaving Camille to fend for herself most of the evening. Then he dropped her off at home to go hang out with his friends, and came back to her house later that night to sleep. Camille wasn't pleased at all with this behavior, but I'm guessing it was chalked up to miscellaneous guy stupid-ness. Since that time, he hasn't made any such major blunders as ditching his chick for his friends, so we still like him for now. Next post, I'll update on how they've managed to spend time together even though they both have busy schedules. That's right ladies and gentleman, when a man wants to spend time with you, he does.

Noni's Stargazing Saturday: Absence Makes The Heart Grow

***Noni is one of my really good friends from college. We were even roommates for a year and some change. But she's done with school (for now). She's starting a family with a baby boy and working on herself and her relationships at the same time. Things won't always be easy, but they're usually always interesting.***

Quick Recap [I had hope that I would be able to write about Noni quickly, but turns out I wasn't done being busy. Anyway, I last wrote about Noni and Eric preparing for their six weeks to be up. That time has since come and long gone. But they did follow my tips and were successful in making a regular sex life fit into their new baby schedule.]

A lot has happened since then. Truly, a lot. Things had taken a turn for the worse between Noni and Eric. He began working more hours and bought a new video game system. That means a lot of time taken away from Noni and his son. What is it with 20-something men and their video games? I'm just kidding, I love video games too. But I don't think Noni does, especially after being basically ignored for three weeks unless it was to serve dinner or provide sex.

I'm happy to say they worked through those issues, if only because a bigger one was arising. I talked Noni out of picking a fight with him. She said that was the only way to get through to him because that's how he was raised. I told her she could fight what his momma had him used to and go for positive attention instead of negative. I was really super happy when it turns out that it worked and they calmly discussed their issues, just in time for another one.

It's become more economically feasible for them to live in different places. Eric is trying to save up some money to get a better place for them, and Noni is going to live with some family for a while, in a different part of the state. It really really sucks for them to be apart, especially when there are some trust issues there. Again, what is it with 20-something men? But I'm hoping this will soon be resolved. The plan is for her to be gone for just two weeks. We shall see.