Monday, April 5, 2010

Top & Jack

So, Top is my best female friend. She has a boyfriend. We'll call him Jack. He is a Libra. She is a Cancer. That is like oil and water relationship-wise, but fireworks sex-wise. I am all too familiar with the Cancer-Libra toxicity. There are a number of Cancer men who I've been enthralled with when we were just hanging out as friends. But as soon as the talk turns to developing a relationship, things crash and burn on an epic level. I'm not exaggerating, it's seriously epic.

So, Jack and Top met at work. He pursued her. She told him she wasn't interested in getting into a relationship thing because she had just gotten out of a relationship that ended badly (very badly) and she wasn't interested in putting herself out there like that again any time soon. But they had amazing chemistry and he broke her down. They met right around the time I met PT, but they moved forward at a much faster pace, thanks to Jack.

He has done things like purchase her really expensive gifts, tell her he loves her, and spends the night as often as she'll let him. All this before she's even known him for five months. My girl Top is very independent and very careful with what she does with her heart. She is like that all the way through a relationship. Her last relationship lasted for almost 6 years. Jack hasn't even known her for half a year, so he doesn't get these things. His last relationship ended because he proposed and she said no. You'd think he'd be more careful with his heart, that's what Top thought. I tried to tell her, he's a Libra (like me), and he is going to do no such thing.

Libras like to be in love and in like and the quicker we can get there, the better. She truly doesn't get that. That is actually the crux of the problem with the Libra-Cancer relationship demise. We truly see relaionships very differently and often get too upset or lose concern, so the differences never get sorted out into a middle ground.

Top and Jack seem on their way to an epic crash and burn. That makes me sad because when she realized she really liked him she said she would do her best to break the Cancer-Libra curse. I was hoping she really meant it. I think she did at the time, but when things started to get tough, she lost her will to fight. In her defense, he really put his foot in it. He told her he loved her and then said he didn't want to rush her feelings. But then when she still hadn't said it back after a week, he proceeded to try to "test" her to see if he could elicit the feelings another way. This pissed her off because his tricks weren't exactly subtle and she called him on it, leading to a fight. I don't see how he could genuinely be upset that she doesn't love him yet. It hasn't even been 6 months! Even I'm not that crazy of a Libra, lol. But I do get how he hates the idea of being out there on that love limb by himself. But if he can deal with that and she can stop freaking out because he sees things a little differently than her, they may make it. I'll keep posting as things develop.

Me Update: PT and me are fine in case anyone reading yesterday's post thinks differently. We're just us, enjoying each other's company and seeing where it goes. August texted me today, I didn't respond. At some point, I'll need to figure out a better way of behaving towards him...

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