Monday, March 21, 2011

Gloria's Romantic Monday: Bridesmaids And Weddings

***Gloria is a friend of mine I know from church. She is a single mother. She has a boyfriend, Gregory, who we all love and her son's father, Rufus, who we all hate. She is fun-loving and hilarious. Gloria is the type of friend who'd be there for you at a party, when things get tough, or even if you need help applying for school.***

Last week, I spoke a bit about Gloria's trip to Texas, and I have bad news about the hopeful ending to last week's post. Gloria is more sure than ever that she wants to move to Texas. She really hates the cold and after her trip, that type of climate is right up her alley.

I talked about the schools and the ever-decreasing budget, and she said there were pockets with good schools, and she'd just move there. I'm so sad that she's planning on leaving. I guess it's good because that means I'll have somewhere great to go visit. Also, I can't be selfish. I'm talking about moving to St. Louis and then to New York City. She can certainly go to Texas.

Gloria is one of my favorite people to talk to about the future. She's in a similar boat that I am. She and Gregory have been together for less than a year, yet they are sure the other is The One and they have plans to get married sooner rather than later, but they aren't officially engaged yet.

Gloria wants something very different from what I want though. She's being very realistic about her and Gregory's financial situation and the fact that they both have small boys. She's decided that she doesn't want a big fancy wedding, or even a reception. She just wants to stroll over to the church with wedding license in hand, a couple of close friends and family, and get married on the day of their choosing without all the stress, planning, and financial burden.

That led to an interesting conversation about bridesmaids because Gloria doesn't intend to have them. From what she said, I gathered that her boyfriend Gregory also doesn't mind if they have this wedding and he doesn't have to choose groomsmen. I think he'd like to give Gloria a nice wedding, but he's not so for it that he's against her super small wedding idea.

So back to Gloria and her lack of bridesmaids. One of the girls in our group, who I'm pretty sure I've never mentioned by name, has been asked to be a bridesmaid in the wedding of another girl from our church who recently got engaged. We were all surprised, asking if they were even friends and how the rest of us had missed that. She didn't explain, but said that she had agreed, especially since the wedding wasn't to be until 2013. She figured she could purchase a dress and show up the day of the wedding with no extra fuss. I'll be interested to see if it turns out that way or not.

The discussion then turned to whether or not you had to ask certain people to be bridesmaids even if you weren't close friends. And also should you ask someone back to be a bridesmaid just because you were a bridesmaid in their wedding. All I'm saying is, Gloria is very lucky that she will probably not have bridesmaids when she gets married. Our little close group of friends from our church has done a good job of having our friendships transfer from being teenagers to being adults. But there are some of us within the group who were never very close.

Gloria doesn't have to deal with that whole situation, or with dragging close friends in from out of town for the wedding. I know this is a lot of wedding talk for a chick who isn't even engaged yet. But I think it's good to talk about these things to make sure you're on the same page about the near future. It's no different than talking about other future things, like career plans, where to live plans, etc.

Gloria and Gregory seem to be on the same page about the big stuff, he is on board with moving to Texas. But I don't know how he feels about the wedding. Gloria just keeps saying that he wants everything to be perfect before they take the next step. I hope that's a more realistic sentiment than it sounds. I'm just excited for Gloria that she will be sooner rather than later taking a big step towards the future she's been dreaming about with a man who truly loves her.

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