Sunday, March 20, 2011

Sonny's Sunday: Going Out? Not Without My Fiancee

***Sonny is an old friend of mine. We went to elementary, middle, and high school together. He's also my friend who's doing the super-adult thing. He and his new fiancee Cher just bought a house. They're working on planning a life together. Even with all that stability, their love life is still interesting.***
Read Sonny's Sunday posts.

Last week, I was giving props to Sonny and Cher for appearing to not have succumb to a problem that plagues some most engaged people. They know that their life doesn't revolve around planning their wedding. They are allowing their life to develop together. I think they know that at the end of the day, their time as engaged couple will only be a drop in the bucket compared the the length of a life that they plan to share. And Cher is a vegan. That chick isn't going anywhere anytime soon.

This week, I want to talk about something that I've mentioned before on this blog that troubles me. Last Thursday, Easy had this idea that his friends and mine could all go out for St. Patrick's Day. That type of celebration isn't likely to happen again in  years to come as we progress through out 20s. I certainly don't know too many black folks in their thirties going out for a night on the town with their friends for St. Patty's Day. Gloria would have come out without Gregory. And Jordan. They didn't Thursday night, but that was a whole fiasco that I'll explain in a post on my main blog.

So we had these plans, and we invite several friends. Sonny and Cher are two of the friends that I invited out with us. Sonny said he thought it would be great fun to go hang with the drunken people on the north side and he would check with Cher when she got home from work.

I told him that she might want to come out, but even if she didn't because of work the next morning, he could still come out. And of course, that didn't happen. I didn't see either of them that night. I know for a fact that Sonny had nothing to do that night. It sucks that he wasn't able to come out because Cher wasn't able also.

I probably shouldn't make comparisons, but

I don't know if I even want to encourage that they get more comfortable spending time apart. It seems unrealistic in this global world structure to demand that you, as a couple, spend all your free time together. But there are still people who do it. They can be attached enough to each other to truly desire to never be apart. I guess if they both end up with local careers and family close by, there wouldn't be a need to get used to one person being out of the country, like Bad and Jordan or Easy and me. And because they don't have a ton of friends outside of each other, I guess they don't really fall into the Gloria and Gregory box either.

This is not the first time I've mentioned this, definitely not in this blog. I'm still trying to figure out if it's something I should get involved with. I just miss Sonny. I miss the time we used to spend together. When he's with Cher, he's still him completely, there just doesn't seem to be the usual flow of information. Catching up like friends do is a much more arduous process. And my attempts to be friends with Cher outside of Sonny haven't gone well.

Maybe that's what I'll do. I'll try again to be friends with her outside of him. If she and I can connect and she starts to think it's a good idea that she has girl time outside of him, then maybe it won't be this terrible thing if he spends time without her too. I don't know if it will work, but I should try. Because I don't ever want him to feel stifled and plus, she and I had a lot of fun together that one time we went out dancing with Bad.

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