Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Lion's Life Wednesday: Not Yet Considering The Future

***Lion is my best friend from college. He's a very focused young man working on getting his MD. This focus makes having a love life a very difficult undertaking. But he's making it happen somehow.***
Read Lion's Life Wednesday posts.

Last week I talked about perceptions, and trying to figure out how I could invest more in the relationship between Lion and his girlfriend Rudy.

This week, I don't really have much more to say about that. I want to talk about bit about Lion's career path and how that may affect his relationship over the coming years.

Lion is in medical school (in case you didn't read the leading paragraph), and he's super busy all the time. For instance, right now he's doing his OB/GYN rotation and he's barely able to get two days off for us to go down to Florida back to our alma mater to hang out with our friends that are still there (along with his girlfriend Rudy).

He works ton of hours and is always busy studying for the shelf exam at the end of the rotation, trying to impress his supervisors, and trying to maintain his sanity. Most of the time when he speaks to Rudy, it's through text message. With her work schedule and classes, they have very little mutual free time.

I've never heard Lion describe the two of them as "close." But they do seem to really like each other and really love each other. And luckily, neither of them is needy and needs a lot of time from their significant other (SO). But these two are in their mid-20s. Women start to get the itch about the future and wonder what's next. These two have been involved on and off for years now.

Lion knows a few things for sure about his future. He wants to go to residency somewhere warm. He's not sure what type of medicine he wants to practice yet. He may get married, but right now he can't even imagine having children. He wants to be able to focus on something other than being a dad.

Rudy wants to be married and have a family. That definitely doesn't match what I just said about Lion. As they're approaching the end of his medical school career, he graduates in June 2012, they will have some decisions to make. They haven't discussed where he's applying to residency programs (he doesn't know himself yet) and they haven't discussed the possibility of her making plans to join him wherever he is.

He's apprehensive about that discussion because he feels is she and he move to the same city where ever he does his residency (it won't be a city either of them live in now), then he will be implying that they have this future that leads to the traditional milestones of an aging relationship. Not exactly the message he wants to send.

That is a lot to sort out on top of his career decisions. But knowing all the intricacies is bound to help the blogosphere understand why I'm dying to observe the two of them together in two weeks when we get down to Florida.


Keda said...

Possibly if Rudy just relaxes and realises that this doctor boyfriend of hers is a real catch, they could work things out. I think. Lion sounds like a really driven and goal orientated guy, plus being into the helping people business. Form my personal viewpoint: When you are that busy studying and have very little else to think about, it's hard to imagine settling and, once you do have the time, spending it obligated to one person. He will probably know what he wants in that area after he has made the decisions regarding his career and has settled in there.
Now I know now woman wants to wait and find it useless, but she really has to decide if he is worth it. Does she love him? Then just relax, lay off, and give him a year or 2 to get at least some of his life settled and back to himself.

CeCe said...

I will definitely pass on what you said to him. I will say this for Lion, he doesn't let others determine the path he takes. I just hope his independence works for her as well.


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